What I want to do.

So I'm back in Savannah now, I'm taking one class, and I have a lot of free time, so what do I do? Well I've been here for 2 weeks and I haven't really updated this blog, so in my search for being more disciplined and productive, heres to a new blog post!

Alright so I have free time, something that many students long to have during college. We want to use this time in so many ways, and yet when we have it, what do we do? Many of us would love to use this time to get closer to God, serve, and just truly walk with the Lord, but what do we do? I just listened to a sermon by Francis Chan (1/29/06 "Priorities: Part 1), and it pretty much struck me on how I use my time.

Haggai 1:7-11

⁷ This is what the LORD Almighty says: "Give careful thought to your ways. ⁸ Go up into the mountains and bring down timber and build the house, so that I may take pleasure in it and be honored," says the LORD. ⁹ "You expected much, but see, it turned out to be little. What you brought home, I blew away. Why?" declares the LORD Almighty. "Because of my house, which remains a ruin, while each of you is busy with his own house. ¹⁰ Therefore, because of you the heavens have withheld their dew and the earth its crops. ¹¹ I called for a drought on the fields and the mountains, on the grain, the new wine, the oil and whatever the ground produces, on men and cattle, and on the labor of your hands."

One thing that the sermon talks about is that we always have time to do things we feel God is calling us to do, but not enough time to do those things alongside with the goals we have set out for ourselves. These goals could be a relationship, school, sports, entertainment, or whatever, but we really don't have time to do both. Ok so we have those 2 categories of "God things," and "our things," and in our hearts we want to do those "God things." Well when it comes to those "God things," we are praying, asking for guidance of others, and just searching for some sort of sign. We want to see like a burning bush, or hear some Godly echoing voice in our heads, we really want to be sure so that we don't go doing something Godly, without God behind us. BUT on the other hand, when we want to do something personal like watching Tv, playing games, or even like homework, we just do it. So why is this?

In Haggai, basically God wants His people to rebuild the temple, but they are spending their time building their own nice houses and doing their own thing. I believe that the reason we pray for some things and not for others, is because we still want control. We really want God to take control because we honestly know that He knows better, but at the same time, we don't want to let go of our "freedom" to "enjoy" things. Now I believe that it is merely by grace that we are able to enjoy things in this fallen world, and I am not saying we should just be happy only when doing things like praying, worshipping, or serving. But merely that our "God things," and "our things," should become one, and that our pleasure comes out of living through God, rather than living with God assistance. Enjoying things like games, tv, or whatever is not bad in its own, but if we are so free to do these things without a supernatural sign, then we should do the same when it comes to telling a friend/family member about Christ, praying over someone, or just merely showing love to someone that we feel doesn't deserve it. I think a lot of time is wasted when we are waiting for some supernatural sign, when God has already told us in His word what to do.

Ephesians 6:13-20

13Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm.14Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, 15and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. 16In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; 17and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, 18praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints, 19and also for me, that words may be given to me in opening my mouth boldly to proclaim the mystery of the gospel, 20for which I am an ambassador in chains, that I may declare it boldly, as I ought to speak.

You know after reading all this...

We are definitely over-equipped to be spending a day watching tv.

I pray that God would help me use my time wisely, and that I would keep my focus on Him. To remind me that He is the creator, He has saved me from my sins, and He deserves all my praise and all the glory.

-nam

O Praise Him!

So I've been pretty slacking on posting lately, and thankfully I feel that Im getting out of my slump. So much has happened in the last month or so and God has revealed many things to me in my daily walk with Him. My summer FG (family group/bible study group) pretty much ended, and after being together for only the small summer we had, I feel that we all bonded pretty tightly.

Thank you God for bringing these people into my life, I definitely didnt expect or deserve any of these blessings, but I am grateful to have met everyone and been able to study Your Word with them :D. I hope that we'll be able to continue fellowship in the future, and I pray that we will all continue to seek you and get to know you more :D

FG and JCA (the church I attend in ATL) have definitely been taking up about 85% of my free time after work, and im enjoying every minute. Being able to serve is definitely satisfying, but also very tiring since I start the day working for 8 hours or more. One thing I've learned about myself is how much I struggle with just being lazy. The few days I have free time for myself, I just want to lay down, relax, talk to my gf (hello semi :D), and just play games or dance.

Speaking of which, one thing that I've been learning lately is worship. I feel there are many things that are commonly seen as worship, but I felt kind of troubled because I was battling between worship and my style of dancing. To me, I feel that dancing was so prideful. But then as I started to think about it, God gave me this gift, and I could use it to worship Him. Its something very different compared to something like body worship, but I really want to dance and worship and inspire others to use the creative gifts that God has given them to worship in ways they never imagined. I want to not hold back and just soak this in prayer, and humbly take a stage and dance in sincere worship to God.



I took this small clip while I was in Hong Kong. It is very random, but sick people would wear these masks, so to cover my shyness, I used the mask, but also just kinda played off it.


I feel theres a lot on my mind that I could just keep typing, but I think I will leave that for other posts and leave with this...

"There's many things in my life that I cant quite explain

But I find so much comfort in the Worthy Lamb whom was slain

To look at my life and see things go wrong

But yet to give out a smile and know that I am weak yet He is so strong

Oh how He loves, and yet we still stray away

I cant wait for the day that we may love Him in the same way.

Oh how He loves, and I just want to love Him back

Please give me the strength, because that is what I lack

You've given me so much, but let me not forget Your name

I pray and hope that I will worship you with every breathe that I take

God you are so good

Your divine nature i long to partake

I cant wait for the day to see You face to face

to know my God is faithful for He does not forsake!"

love, nam

God is good? No, He's much better.

Thanks Chongho for posting! Its encouraging to see someone else posting :D and It will definitely be a blessing to see what God is doing over there. God is definitely awesome.

So yea, I recently went to Hong Kong and China and I visited a lot of neat things, we visited some design firms, we saw a giant idol buddha statue, saw giant factories of workers in conditions we would think were poor, but Its funny cause I think my main highlight was seeing this chinese guy in the subway. He was sitting there reading a bible, and I waited to make eye contact, and when we did, i pointed to his bible and gave him a thumbs up. When he saw that, you could just see his face just light up with a smile, and I was just like WOOOO!!.

But I seriously cant even think of Hong Kong or China over the weekend I've just had, and I just want to praise God for all that happened. I know i'll probably end up typing way too much, but I cant help myself.

So some of you may know that me and Joan are in a situation where I seriously dont know the outcome. Nothing bad has happened, so no worries there, but through this time God has revealed to me so much about my heart.He has helped heal, strengthen, and refine my heart, and I cant help but rejoice amongst this situation.

Throughout me and Joan's relationship, I've felt God has used me to help biblically counsel Joan at times. I've seen the good fruit that the conversations produce, and I can see God moving. Fast forward to now, Joan is taking time with God to see where He is going to lead this relationship. At this time, I was pretty distressed, I "knew" God was in control, and i had a good feeling, but It wasn't until this weekend during the AMI Revolution (a retreat of several churches), that I truly felt what it meant. Because Joan is taking time, we haven't talked on the phone or anything so that she isn't influenced by anything but God, and inside of me, I thought that I should be the one to counsel her, due to our past experiences. I felt that I needed to be the one to do it, because I did it in the past. One thing that was made clear to me, was that I never did anything in the first place. God was the one that spoke to Joan, God was the one that healed Joan, God was the one that produced that fruit, and God is the one that is going to take Joan out of her situation and into His arms. Guys, God timing has been amazing...the retreat I went to lasted from thursday night to sunday after morning service (I took friday off from work.) With all the situations with Joan, the China trip, and everything going on, it was just a vulnerable time for me to humble myself and give myself to God. And because I was broken with knowing that things were out of my control and that I wasn't distracted by any personal desires, I truly felt an overflow of my cup that I desperately needed.

Guys It seriously felt the closest to home, where you see everyone praising, everyone worshipping, and you could see the love of Christ in the air. It was amazing. Theres so much that happened but I'll try to outline it, and if anyone wants to know more of what happened you can just call me :P

*What is the most important thing in ministry?

-the state of our hearts. If our hearts arent right, we cant fully authentically worship, pray, or love God. We cannot escape our own heart, so even if we try to change the situation or environment, our hearts are still the same.

*We emphasize too much on being a servant and not a son. We base too much of our lives on performance. We cannot earn grace. We will tire ourselves out by trying to reflect our grace on our works. A canary flaps its wings a lot to fly, where an eagle just glides and is carried in the wind.

*BTW BEN, theres a lot of reasons why I felt you should have came, but 2 reasons I know you should have came, was 1. They went over Acts 2, and also the other reason was that the lunch that afternoon was catered by CHIPOTLE. But anyway, yea they went over Acts 2, and the thing I got out of this is we hide behind sufficiency. "John 3:34For he whom God has sent utters the words of God, for he gives the Spirit without measure." I know for myself, I say that God can do anything, but a lot of times I feel that that my faith lacks how much God can do. "What we need is not more knowledge, we need power to break us down, to be renewed, to understand God's power." When I thought of Acts 2, I thought of it more as something that was needed for that time, but then through this sermon, we all asked ourselves "Is there more?, Do we want more?, and How do we get more?" So we know that there is more through scripture, of course we want more, the Spirit is definitely something we always want more of, and when we ask how do we get more, It really depends on God on what He wants to do, and what He feels we need.

*We are not defined by our situations, but defined by Christ. We must really train ourselves to love God. Its not about being legalistic, but theres a lot of things in our lives, and especially mine, that i train my mind on other things, so when I sit back at times and relax, am I thinking of God and His majesty, glory, love, mercy, and grace, or am I thinking of video games, movies, music, dancing, or people. I feel God deserves all my praise.

*there was a lot more, but I'll finish with the sermon on sunday which talked about in the midst of blessings, how do we continue to praise God when we start going back in the world. This references 1 Samuel 1:1-19, and to sum it up, even when we are distressed and lacking in the world's perspective, we must remember to continue praising God, and remember God's character, to know He is the Lord of Hosts, and that He is good, and when we understand this, we can pray with authentic worship, and have a heart focused on God, and not just complain to God, but really talk to God as our father, because our problems are His problems, because He cares for us. :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Please pray for me and Joan! I wait to see the day that God brings us together again!

Saturday Bible Study (19 June 2010)

Teacher :
Brooks White -- volunteer teacher of Pittsburgh Region International Students Ministries(PRISM)

Verse :
Philippians 2:19 - 24
(Bible version : NASB)

(19) But I hope in the Lord Jesus to send Timothy to you shortly, so that I also may be encouraged when I learn of your condition. (20) For I have no one else of kindred spirit who will genuinely be concerned for your welfare. (21) For they all seek after their own interests, not those of Christ Jesus. (22) But you know of his proven worth, that he served with me in the furtherance of the gospel like a child serving his father. (23) Therefore I hope to send him immediately, as soon as I see how things go with me; (24) and I trust in the Lord that I myself also will be coming shortly.


Summary :
In these verses, Paul shows the importance of discipleship. He has Timothy as his disciple who has "kindred spirit" like no one else and is also ready to be sent to wherever he is needed.

* "With him" Principle
- Mark 3:14 (And He appointed twelve, so that they would be with Him and that He could send them out to preach)
- True disciples are the ones who are with you and also can be sent out for mission

* True Servants
- As described in verse 22, both Paul and Timothy showed good example of what we should do to be useful to God and others.
- Mark 9:35 (Sitting down, He called the twelve and said to them, "If anyone wants to be first, he shall be last of all and servant of all.")

* Qualities of good disciples
- Proxy (Timothy being sent on behalf of Paul)
- Passion
- Pro-creation / Production / Protege
- Proponent
- Preoccupied
- Proven (tested by time)
- Parent-child relationship
- Pupil (apprentice) -> Luke 6:40
- Profession
- Pressing need
- Pals (Paul and Timothy)
- In person -> Philippians 2:24 (Paul still wants to go there in person)

Remarks :
- Is our heart at someone else's spiritual growth?
- Are we sendable? Are we of kindred spirit?
- Where is your Timothy? Start praying for one!
- Paul lived for the next generation. What about us?
- Do we have a genuine concern for others, or are we just phony?
- Devil holds you back (by putting false guilt upon us), but the Holy Spirit pushes us forward.

My first humble post

It's great to see my good friend Nam's starting a blog about his walking with Jesus Christ.

Thanks to God's grace, I, Chongho Lee (who was mentioned in Nam's previous post called "Networking"), joined Nam in his effort to run this blog.
This is a great opportunity for us to learn from each other, encouraging each other as "iron sharpens iron" (proverbs 27:17).

Every Saturday I will keep on trying to post what I study in my Saturday bible study so I can share with Nam and all those who stumble upon this blog.

Hey Nam, again, thank you for starting this and inviting me to join!
I heard that running a blog is all about consistent posting, so let's do our best to do that!

Without further ado, my post on today's (19 June 2010, Saturday) Bible Study follows...

Networking

As an industrial designer, its funny how networking is so important. You could seriously do some good work in school, but if you don't have any connections or social skills, it would seriously hinder you in the job market. I'm not saying that the work doesn't speak for itself, but knowing the right people definitely helps you show that work to the right people.

This reminds me of my experience at an Interaction Conference I volunteered at where there were hundreds of employers, all of whom I should probably network with. So during this conference, I met several employers, students, and designers around the nation. But I remember distinctly during my lunch break, a few fellow volunteers and I went to grab some lunch at one of the conference spots. As we were entering the back room, the server stopped me and told me that the back room was full, so I wouldnt be able to eat back there. So all the people I was going to go eat lunch with just kept walking and didn't turn back. So I was like "Mmm, Ok, God has a reason for this." So I looked around the room I was currently standing in to see where I wanted to sit and eat. I will go ahead and say that God knows my heart, and He knows that my heart is probably a good percentage Korean. (Long story, but yea.) So there was a Korean guy sitting by himself at one table, and so I decided to sit next to him. His name was Chongho, and we did the general "Oh what do you do?" conversations, and then the table started filling up with other people, probably around 8 people in all. After we received our food, I bowed my head to pray, and as I lifted my head, I saw his lift as well. I was like "HMMMM" so a little later, I brought up church, and then BOOM, instant connection. We ended up talking about God, and how Christ is just awesome, and I eventually ended up inviting him to church. I remember he was saying that he was originally upset cause he would have had to miss church that sunday since it was an all weekend conference, but God put us together and he ended up coming to church with me which was an awesome day.

But this was just the beginning, the night after I met Chongho, which was a Saturday, I went to a networking party, where it seriously is just a bunch of professionals together just hanging out. I ended up meeting more people, but one person in particularly I met, I enjoyed talking to, and he would have a been a great contact to have as I search for internships and future jobs. Sadly though, he had no more business cards, so i was pretty bummed, but someone said they would email his contact info later, but that just made me feel kinda uneasy. Either way, the night ended, and the next morning was church with Chongho!

Church was awesome, and afterwards Chongho went to see more conference speakers as I was volunteering at the main conference building. Before we left church though, I told Chongho that I would drop him off at the airport when the conference was over. So I kept in mind that the guy that I met the night before would most likely be at the conference building I was at, so after the speaker was done, everyone started leaving. Chongho shows up and I told him "Just a couple more minutes" because well for 1, I was technically still volunteering, but more seriously 2, I wanted to see if I could find that contact so I could technically "secure" my own wants. After looking around for awhile, I stopped and thought "What am I doing?, if God wants this to happen, than it would happen!" So afterwards I grabbed Chongho and I took him to the airport. I pull up aside the departing plane drop off area, and I send him off his way. As he is walking towards the airport, a car pulls up behind me. And guess who it was? It was the guy that I met at the networking party, and when I spoke to him again, he found some more of his business cards so I was able to get his contact. Afterwards I was pretty ecstatic, and I felt me and God had an awesome moment where I was just looking up and thinking "...You are good..."

Now that I look back to that moment which was like Fall 2009, I haven't really kept in contact with that guy, but me and Chongho keep in touch. I know God is planning something awesome so I cant wait to see what amazing things he does. Aside from this story though, there was a main point I wanted to bring up.

1. Networking is pretty easy, when it's about ourselves.

So God has blessed me with the ability to naturally be able to speak well with others, and I am grateful for that, but I wonder if I'm using that blessing in the best way possible. When I think of networking for design, It is easy to do. Maybe you'll do some research on specific companies that will be at the conference so you know what you can talk about. Maybe you bring around a mini-portfolio so you can spark interest in yourself so others will be able to engage you more. Either way, theres several little elements that we do to try to have that connection with people. But with all this work to establish ourselves, how much work do we put into establishing God?

2. Networking is hard, when it's about God.

I know there are several times in our lives when we know we should of brought God up. We walk into a shopping mall, a cafe, or wherever. Any place we go there are several people, all of whom could be children of God. Do we spark conversations to see how people are doing? Do we seriously care? Do we want to be God's hands and feet? Do we feel that God will just use someone else? Do we want to shine the light, or are we waiting to turn the light on when we are safe in our homes? All these things run through my head when I see people around me, especially people that I see on a daily basis. As a follower of Christ, these are things that I pray that God will put into my heart. God loves us so much, and I want to share that with other people. We are definitely not perfect, we struggle constantly, and God still forgives us and loves us even though we definitely deserve Hell.

I can honestly say that over time, I can see God has been working in my heart for others. I have had cases with embracing the homeless, reconnecting with family members, loving and praying for those who society would call wretched, and definitely humbling myself before people, so that they may feel the compassion of the Lord. Before I met Christ, I was pretty comfortable just living in my own world. But now Christ lives in me, and I really want to share that love he gives me with others. Its not that I do these things as a means to prove myself. Its not that I do these things to be forgiven. For I do not want to act upon my pride, but I merely want to express my love for the living God whom loved me first.

Ephesians 2:1-10

Made Alive in Christ

¹As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, ²in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. ³All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath. ⁴But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, ⁵made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. ⁶And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, ⁷in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. ⁸For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— ⁹not by works, so that no one can boast. ¹⁰For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

God knows our hearts

Its funny how God works...

Someone who is so powerful and all-knowing, yet he wants us to have a relationship with Him, and even when sacrificing His only Son, he still shows up throughout our lives to help us out and care for us. I remember hearing about God's everlasting and unconditional love when I first came to Christ, and years later, I am just now actually seeing how much we take that for granted. When we choose sin over God, when we choose earthly desires over God, when we plain out turn our backs on God, He is still there just waiting for us, to redeem us, and just love us. Think about how many conditions we put onto God. Our selfishness and pride sets this bar above us, that when things aren't at this bar, it's like we cant love God with all our hearts, soul, and strength.

These are just a few situations that are in my head that I feel compelled to talk about...

School.
Yes, we want to glorify God, working can be a form of worship, but are you worshipping God or are you worshipping your work?

I feel that God really stressed this to me last quarter, that If I didn't have God first in mind, then things just wouldn't work out. One day, God would bless me with diligence, ideas, and creativity, and then one day later, I drew blank. I started stressing out, deadlines due, quality was crap, quantity not met, and just a lot of things just weren't going right. I then started to slow down, recollect my thoughts, and I started praying because I realized I couldn't do this on my own. God revealed to me that i wasn't focused on Him but merely just focusing on all the circumstances. I then realized that I was being prideful because God helped me the day before, and because of this I would start comparing myself to other students, thinking about what the professor would say, the final outcomes, and all these circumstances that God already had control of, but I just merely didn't see it. Once I realized all these things, I gave it all to God. Afterwards, I felt that I was free of all the burdens and all the work just poured out, and It wasn't that God was embedding me with holy power, but it was that God was just telling me to work, not compare, and not think of the outcomes, because everything was already in His hands. There is so much power that is revealed through just Trust alone.

After thinking about this situation, I tried to picture God's perspective. He is our loving father, and we are one of his children running around. We love our father to no bounds, and then we trip, and scrape our knee a little. We start crying and freaking out and just yelling "BANNNDD-AAAIIIDD!! IMMAA DIEEE," but God just says "You're fine, its going to heal," and so we continue to freak out for at least another 10 minutes. During this time, we are so focused on trying to ease the pain, that we don't even listen to our father, and by the time we notice the pain is gone, we realize "Oh....He was right...." We can start living life free from these burdens when we start seeing the outcome, and as we know, the outcome is already won.

Bible Study
Time where we can have fellowship, worship, and just time to praise God. But do we really want time for that?

There are a lot of times when our situations get the best of us. We sit and wait around as if our situations are going to change, but our situations wont change, until our perspectives do. Bible studies I feel is a good way to see where your priorities are. Now i know there are time conflicts, and things just happen, but there are times when you have to think to yourself, "Could i have made the time?" Whether it be doing work early or making people aware of your schedules, I feel that this is a good time to show others where your heart is. People understand that church is on Sundays, so they are more accustomed to change the schedule around for that, but if people see that you take your time out of your week in the midst of classes, work, finals, or whatever, it tells something about us...that we aren't just your typical church goer. This is a time where when we do stand firm in our commitments, that people see that God related arrangements aren't ones we take lightly. Just think about how someone would respond to this statement,

"No, I cant meet up at 5:00pm on Wednesdays, I have bible study at that time."

Its not any statement that is profound or prophetic, you aren't arrogantly forcing your beliefs on them, but one thing it does show is that you have priorities. Now If you are going to express something like this, at least go to the bible study, I don't think telling people that and lying would be a great idea. Especially when you lie to them, and then they see you at the mall at the time of your bible study. :P I think first and foremost, is that we have to be true to ourselves. God knows our hearts. so lets show our hearts to others as well.

-nam